And Why I am a Little Bit of Both

Hi, friends,

I know it’s been a couple months but things have been extremely crazy in my world. If you haven’t gotten caught up on that tea, I recommend reading this newsletter post. And while you’re there, sign up for the newsletter so you don’t miss the one-off updates like that!

Today’s blog post however is a topic that is basically my life and honestly wanted to chat about it because I find that the reaction to either label is usually a mixed bag. You’re either going to have people call you one or the other. Or you’re going to have a relationship find it a problem – both of which I have experienced.

High Maintenance vs Low Maintenance

I think we all know the definitions by now, but I wanted to walk through it as well before we dive in.

If someone is describing you as “high maintenance”, it is inferred that you are someone who requires a lot of time, money, or effort to support your lifestyle. While the opposite is true if you are “low maintenance”, it is inferred that you are someone who does’t require a lot of time, money, or effort to support your lifestyle.

I’m truly not sorry but in today’s world, I think life is generally high maintenance no matter who you are due to the cost of living. And I personally have a weird love/hate relationship with these terms.

Why is being either sometimes considered bad?

In a patriarchal society, let’s be honest: anything a female presenting person does is never considered enough.

That’s right. I said the quiet part aloud! How dare I?

If you don’t put enough care into your wardrobe and looks, then you’re lazy. But if you put effort in and someone thinks it is over the top, then you’re considered too much.

Double freaking standard at its finest.

It’s not a bad thing to be either of these. You get to make the decision on how you live your life and if people want to label you either of these, then they have their own problems.

Do I still use these to describe some of my life choices? Yes.

Will I ever stop? Most likely not and I’m okay with that.

But I do not call anyone – besides Lady Katherine- either of these things.

What am I?

A cliche as it may sound, I am both.

I hear the possible screams of “What do you mean, Trula?” And “Weren’t you just saying that we don’t have to use these labels?”

Yes, I said all of that. But I also said that I use them to only describe myself – and Lady Katherine – related to things that I do.

What it means is that I am a person who has high maintenance tendencies so that I can live a low maintenance life for the majority of the time. Yep, that’s right. There are some of us strange birds who exist where we function on high maintenance tendencies for a short amount of time so that our lives can be as low maintenance as possible the majority of the time.

For me, that means that I do things like going and having my nails done in a way that last for a minimum of two weeks (the longest I’ve pressed is a month) so that I do not have to worry for the most part about having my nails break or the polish chip. I spend a little longer doing my hair when I blow dry it with products to help it stay healthy so that I don’t have to do much to it until the next wash – this also includes a special shoutout to my Overnight Blowout rollers because they are part of this process. I see my stylist on a relatively regular basis to trim my bangs and gloss my hair to also help with the hair situation.

To essentially wrap it up, these terms can be used to be rude when someone is judging someone else OR you can choose to use it yourself to empower yourself by turning around the thought process around these terms.

I hope that you enjoyed this walk around the block and would love to hear your thoughts in the comments!

My love,

Trula Marie

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